seven...

“Why married women Zach? Is it because they don’t need a commitment?”

Julie and I have known each other for five years. I met her when she was on the rebound from a three year long relationship. We went on a couple of dates but it didn’t go anywhere. We avoided each other for a few weeks after that but we had the same circle of friends and kept running into each other, and somehow, over the years, we became friends.

“That’s partly the reason,” I tell her. I excuse myself to go to the bathroom. She’s right. About the commitment part. But it’s not entirely true.

The first time I did it, it was for the thrill. And maybe also the danger. I was 27-yrs-old and lonely. I didn’t say no to sex, no matter who asked. And I thought I was in love with her. It was only a few years later that I realized it was pure unmodulated desire. I still get excited when I think about the sexual energy I had with her, my first married woman. I don’t fall in love with these women anymore. Or, rather, I don’t mistake the sexual charge for love.

And there are other reasons now besides great sex. Single woman don’t seem to like me anymore. They have this radar. They know they can’t trust me. But married women, they don’t care. They are not looking for a relationship. Just distraction. Or maybe some attention that they no longer get from their husband.

Anyway, not too many guys would get involved with a married woman. So, it’s easy to seduce them. They aren’t too picky. They don’t care about my spendthrift habits; well, actually, they like it. I buy them lavish presents. They don’t care when I’m irresponsible. They already have a responsible man to take care of them. They like the ‘bad boy’ in me and they love my body. They want to play and I’m the perfect playmate.

“What would you do if Richard ever found out?” Julie asks in the cab.

“Leave.”

“You won’t miss her?”

“A little bit in the beginning. But I’ll find someone else.”

There’s never a shortage of married women wanting to have sex. Plus, it’s easy to leave a married woman. I know that I’m not leaving her alone. And the women I sleep with can afford to buy emotional support. Or another lover, for that matter.

“How do these things end, anyway?”

It wasn’t something I had thought about until now.

“Dunno… the last one…she decided to make it work with her husband.” Was that the reason? I couldn’t remember. But Julie seemed satisfied with my answer. Wait, how did it end? I suppose it doesn’t matter. I always know that it’ll end. I expect it to end. It still hurts when it ends. But it hurts less and less each time.